Bad day to be a meat-stick.

Got some Battlestar fun last night, with 6 people. So we had 2 Cylons and a sympathetic Cylon. The sympathetic Cylon was screwed because he got one of the harder missions: keep morale & population within 2 of each other.

Anyway, the humans died. Correction, the humans got curb-stomped. Never made it to New Caprica before we blew every civilian ship out of the sky.

I say "we" because I got to be a Cylon again. There were no Cylons in the first half and then Boomer and Ellen became a Cylon. I was Ellen and I was basically on the Cylon side before I knew it: two of my crisis cards were Cylon fleets jumping in (we got a lot of those again) and twice I fired Pegasus but rolled a 1 (damaging Pegasus).

But here's the real hilarity: I pulled off what is basically now the Corey Maneuver. It was Adama's turn and then me (I have my Cylon card, got it after the sleeper phase). We have two basestars in front of us, and a special rule on the cylon fleet card that says if we blow up the basestar instead of jumping we lose morale. And the engine room is damaged (you can activate it to make every crisis card advance you on the jump track).

So I tell Adama to activate me with Executive Order. I say I have a politics card that will let me draw two engineering cards so that when I go next I can fix the engine room. Otherwise, I say, we'll have to wait three turns before the engineering person can fix it. Next to me, the sympathetic Cylon player says "He's just doing what he did last game so he can reveal as a Cylon."

It took effort to not strangle him.

My internal monologue had to be a thing of comedy:
(After the Sympathetic Cylon speaks)

"Shit! Marco outed me. Damnit! Don't respond, look down!"
"Crap, you're looking down! You look guilty!"
"Don't look right at her, that's a dead giveaway!"
"You've been quiet too long, say something!"
"What do I say! Can't deny it! That just makes me look more guilty!"
"Okay, you're outed. Best bet you have is the Tell-the-Truth lie."

So I look straight in the eyes of my wife, roll my eyes, and say "Yeah, Marco's right. I'm a Cylon and I'm trying to get you to activate me so I can screw you guys and then reveal."

Yeah, you read that right: Meredith was playing. We asked Nana to drive an hour and babysit so Meredith could play. And in her very first full game, I give what's got to be the world's most bald-faced lie.

She believed me.

Enough to activate me anyway. So rather than do what I was supposed to do, I use Ellens once-per-game ability to become the Admiral. Nuke basestar #1 (morale goes down). Then I realize, between laughing, I get two actions. Nuke basestar #2 (morale goes down). No more nukes for the meat-sticks.

My turn and I reveal. The humans never really recover. Turns out Boomer was a cylon, and I helped get him out of the brig (the irony is that the previous game, we were both Cylons there with him getting me out of the Brig so I could reveal).

The hilarious part is that Boomer went before Adama. Then he tries to get Meredith to activate him again, but she's twice shy. So it didn't work, which is good because I think Meredith would've had a funny aneurysm if she was tricked twice.

Anyway, lots of cylon fleet cards blowing up civilian ships and not enough vipers to save them. Humans went from 10 population to zero in like 2 turns.

So I think "What you should do is activate me . . ." goes in the record books right besides Tom's "You're all making a big mistake."

Who knew that Battlestar could cause a divorce...